Finding Your Perfect Makeup Shade as an Introvert: A Guide for the Shy Shopper

If you relate to my experience, you might have found yourself wandering an Ulta Beauty, trying to appear savvy while feeling anxious inside. Often, I expend more effort debating whether to ask for assistance rather than actually testing out makeup shades. With my ADHD, I can quickly feel overwhelmed, leading to buying multiple concealers just because I couldn’t summon the courage to seek help.

It’s a whole vibe of acting casual while really wishing no one sees how uncomfortable I am. Sound like you? Identifying your foundation or concealer shade without asking for guidance is a skill worth mastering. Let’s face it—requesting help when you’re shy, neurodivergent (or what I fondly call “neuro-spicy”), or simply feeling lost can feel as daunting as scaling Everest in high heels. Add the fact that I’m a guy in a space that isn’t always welcoming, and yep…I get it.

The silver lining? Discovering your ideal concealer or foundation shade doesn’t have to be a social endurance test. Whether you go full solo or slightly engage for assistance, I’ve gathered numerous strategies in my career as a beauty pro to simplify shade matching and reduce stress. Let’s jump in!

1. Know Your Undertone

Before you hit the shelves, let’s break down how to determine your skin’s undertone. Identifying whether you’re cool, warm, or neutral can make picking shades a breeze, like cruising straight to the final level of a game. If you’re reading this and thinking, “You’re moving too quickly. What on Earth is an undertone?” No worries—I’m on it!

An undertone is the subtle hue beneath your skin’s surface—cool (pink, red, or bluish), warm (golden or yellow), or neutral (a blend of both). Recognizing your undertone streamlines selecting the most flattering makeup shades, enhancing the shade-matching journey’s accuracy.

Here’s the trick: Check the veins on your wrist in natural light. If they appear blue or purple, you’re likely cool-toned. If they seem green, you’re warm-toned. If it’s unclear, you’re probably neutral. Another method? Hold gold and silver jewelry against your skin. If gold brightens your complexion, you’re warm-toned; if silver looks better, you’re cool-toned. If both look appealing, welcome to neutral territory. Voila! You now have your baseline.

2. Find a Quiet Corner With Good Light

You know those harsh fluorescent lights that make you resemble a ghost of makeup past? Yeah, avoid those. Natural light is where it’s at. To find it, head toward the store’s front where sunlight streams in through the windows. It’s calmer there, and the lighting is *chef’s kiss.*

Grab a few foundation testers close to your skin tone: I usually pick one a touch lighter and one a tad deeper. Swipe them on the back of your hand or along your jawline. Your hands tend to be darker than your face, so compare your hand next to your face after swiping to ensure a match. Use your phone camera for precision, and look for the shade that seamlessly blends into your skin—that’s your winner! If you’re feeling fancy, take a snapshot for future reference. Seriously, your phone will expose the truth.

3. Stick to Brands and Products That Keep It Simple

Certain brands make shade matching feel like decoding hieroglyphics, while others provide straightforward descriptions. Stick with brands that clarify what you’re getting—these are your allies for easy shopping.

4. Remember, Help Is There If You Want It

Let’s have a moment of truth: I understand that asking for help can feel intimidating—especially when you’re shy or want to avoid chit-chat. But here’s the scoop: the staff at Ulta Beauty (or Sephora, or your go-to beauty store) are genuinely nice. Seriously, they’re not there to judge you; they’re there to assist, and many are skilled at matching like pros. On the off chance you’re feeling brave, a simple “Hey, can you help me find my shade?” is all it takes. No need to explain yourself, and I promise they’ve got your back.

And if asking feels daunting, that’s totally fine too. You still have my tips!

Final Thought: You’re Doing Amazing, Sweetie

Let’s be real: shopping for makeup can feel overwhelming, especially when you’re doing it solo or feeling out of place. Whether you’re testing shades in the sunlight, snapping selfies, or bravely approaching a beauty advisor, remember: you’re doing fantastic. Beauty should be enjoyable, not a source of stress. So take a deep breath, acknowledge your efforts, and do what feels right for you.

And hey, if you ever spot me tucked away in a corner of Ulta Beauty with foundation swatches all over my hand, feel free to come over and say hi. We’ll elevate each other’s vibes.

Big hug,

David

From the DMs is a monthly column where professional hairstylist David Lopez addresses your most pressing beauty queries. Have a topic you want to discuss? Send him a message on Instagram or email him at FromtheDMswithDavid@davidlopezbeauty.com, and let’s keep the dialogue going. By submitting a query, you acknowledge our Submission Terms.